Taking an interest in your spouse or partner’s hobbies can be a great way to spend more time together. But what about those activities that you really just aren’t interested in or could care less about? Say, for example, one of you enjoys shopping and could browse the mall for hours while the other is content just sitting in the car listening to sports-talk radio. Or if your obsession is sports and your partner doesn’t know an I-formation from a hole in the wall? Here are some suggestions to expanding your interests by learning more about your spouse’s.
Speak Up and Be Honest
Communicate openly and honestly. Make it known that you’d like to partake in his enjoyment of watching grown men in spandex crash into each other, but you don’t understand the rules. Ask him to explain the basics before the day of the big game. Nothing irritates a sports fan more than a zillion questions during fourth-and-goal.
Do the Research on Their Hobby
Prior to attempting to hang out with your beloved, do a little research on his hobby. Check out a book from the library or look it up on the internet. You don’t have to be an expert, but knowing a bit of what your partner is into might shed light on why they enjoy it. The point is to get to know your partner better.
Be Sensitive to Your Partner’s Choices
Even if you think golf is a bore or you just can’t understand why someone would choose to spend the day scrapbooking, snickering or criticizing your partner’s choice will feel like a personal attack and may diminish her willingness to spend the time with you.
Engaging opportunities are never a waste of time. Make a commitment to try each other’s hobby for at least one day, maybe even just one afternoon. Join him for a baseball game in the spring. Sometimes just being a part of a spirited and rowdy crowd can be exciting. You’re munching on a hot dog and before you know it, you’re starting the wave. Or accompany her to the opera and discover the pleasures of a different type of enthusiastic crowd – the kind that expresses their excitement through quiet observation and appreciative applause.
Agreeing to spend unconditional time with your spouse brings with it a gratitude that only understanding, an open-mind and patience can yield. Perhaps you might find that you admire your husband’s persistence and concentration for fishing, or your wife’s book club selections make for interesting and lively dinner conversations. Regardless of the choices, getting to know your partner better through his or her hobby is the true reward.
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